Taiwo Ajayi Lycette: The consummate thespian

She doesn't look a day older than a woman in her 50s yet this veteran thespian of several decades and counting, Taiwo Ajayi Lycette OON, recently cele

She doesn’t look a day older than a woman in her 50s yet this veteran thespian of several decades and counting, Taiwo Ajayi Lycette OON, recently celebrated her 76th birthday. Her skin glows and is surprisingly devoid of any wrinkle. She is certainly in a class of her own. A lover of the arts in all its ramifications, this multiple award winning actress who has showcased her innate skills across several continents is as talented as they come. Starting off her career at the prestigious Royal Court Theatre, Sloane’s Square, London and the British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC), her career soared when she became the only black actor on the set of the popular 80s British television series, ‘Some mothers do have them’, starring alongside Frank Spencer. Taiwo Ajayi Lycette has since added several other careers in between, ranging from business management to marketing communications, teaching, journalism, broadcasting, a life coach etc. The very vocal and highly opinionated legend has proved that she isn’t only a success at juggling different vocations but is clearly on a mission to leave her unforgettable imprints on the sands of time. She is currently in the Mnet West Africa produced soap, Tinsel where she plays ‘Yahimba’, mother to ‘Sheila’ (Ireti Doyle). As it is the month of love, aunty TAL as she is fondly called, not only tells the Editorial/Lifestyle director, Nkarenyi Ukonu about her life’s journey, she goes down memory lane about her only true love, her late husband, a Briton named Aldridge Lycette, who died in 1993, and why he is irreplaceable.

Taiwo Ajayi Lycette

As a woman, especially one who is big on skin care, I am interested in knowing what secret fountain of youth you are drinking from.
Its all in the genes but above all else, I think it is my mind. It is inquisitive. I am also very passionate about serving other people and not being too concerned and obsessed about myself. I try not to worry about peripheral things.

But of course there must be something extra ordinary you are doing to remain ageless
Well I like to swim every day. It is when I am able to calm down to think and everything just crystallizes. I do at least 50 laps. I also do yoga and I work all the time, that helps to keep my mind busy

Isn’t it amazing that at an age when others are thinking of retiring, you are as busy as a young lady just starting her career? Don’t you want to slow down?
My work calendar is fully booked all year round. It is truly amazing. I am always at the peak all year round. Wherever I am, there is always an upward trajectory. I believe in the principle of the more strength you give, the more you get and the more knowledge you are pulling to yourself. I don’t intend to slow down.

You are an actress, a television presenter, a cosmetologist, a life coach etc. How are you able to live a balanced life when you are involved with so many things?
This is exactly what I am talking about, the more strength you give, the more you get and you can also delegate to people who can help out but most of them I juggle myself. A lot of the things I do involves thinking. I have a grip on my mind by mastering it and having greater clarity. That helps.

Last year was a very important year for you as the stage play you were involved in, ‘Hear Word’, got to perform at Harvard University. Considering that you have performed on some of the most prestigious stages, why was this so important ?
Well Harvard is into the arts on a different level entirely. So if they recognize a piece of work and asked that it be shown in their institution, it is a huge accolade for that work and by extension to the people who are involved in it. It also means that the work is of international quality which I have always been advocating for here in Nigeria. Really, we don’t have to defer to anyone as we are capable of doing the best work there is. I was happy to be involved in the play which is an emotionally charged dramatic production based on a collection of true life stories, showcasing female self-discovery and the numerous challenges facing Nigerian women. The whole essence of the production is for people to re-examine how they see women and for people to think again about some so called cultural issues that are not favorable to women. The play portrays women issues such as female mutilation, widowhood rights, abuse of women in offices, VesicoVaginal Fistula (VVF), the pressure for women to get married before a certain age and men’s betrayal to their women. I am afraid education hasn’t touched us very much as elites. We aren’t quite as civilized as we claim we are, otherwise why aren’t women well represented in the polity of our country. Women are still marginalized at all levels. It is wrong to assume that women aren’t up to the task of being in partnership with men to run the country even after all of their educational qualifications. We are superficially in the modern world but far removed from living in the 21st century. So unless men change their perception of women and their role in the society, the society isn’t going to move forward. I have to ask how far forward a country is that ignores, marginalizes and undermines women and even reduce those who work to subsistence existence. Ironically, a lot of the women subjected to subsistence living are the ones who slave to send men to school. We need to celebrate the ingenuity, the sacrifices women make and their contributions to building this country. That in a nutshell is what the play tried to address.

Taiwo Ajayi Lycette with crew members for the stage play, ‘Hear Word’

You once ran a nursery and primary school, why did you shut it down?
Some of my staff conspired to rob me and today they are all suffering even though I never prosecuted anyone. I may not believe in organized religion but I believe in God and I left all in the hands of God to sort out. I don’t have the power, the police don’t have the power either except the owner of the world. I was burgled and brutalized, in fact I shouldn’t be in this country at all. I was humiliated by people who have no self esteem, no self respect. It is exactly 11 years this year. I still have a masseuse massage the area where I still have a concussion from that brutality. I was nearly killed. There was nothing they didn’t do to me, they trussed me up like a chicken. I was 66 years old then and to think that the police were arrogant about handling the case, even asking me in my brutalized state to come in to write my statement. It was simply beyond me. I dropped the case and carried on with life. I not only shut down the school but all the other companies within the compound I operated from as I thought if they needed me, they won’t attempt to kill me. After about a year, I moved back home to England doing my theatre, going on tours, until Mnet people came looking for me to join the cast of Tinsel. So I reckoned, if my country needs me, why not go back. In other words, things change and I know enough to be flexible about life. I go through what everyone goes through but it depends on what focus you give it. After all said and done, I don’t feel bad and I feel that I have experienced everything, I have been through the fire and have been refined. Look at me today, I am flourishing. I am reopening the school because the clamour for it to be reopened is unbelievable.

Taiwo Ajayi Lycette

Is there anything you would have loved to achieve that you are yet to at this age?
Not really. I have affected people’s life through the nursery and primary school that I shut down as most of the students who graduated from the school are all over the world doing very well in their various endeavours.

As a widow, why haven’t you thought of remarrying?
Marriage is a very personal thing, it is very involved. In other for me to remarry, I must fall in love with the person.

Haven’t you met anyone yet, after all these years, to fall in love with?
In what circumstances would I meet such a person long enough to develop that kind of attachment and fall in love? I don’t believe in love at first sight. Love goes with sex and I can’t sleep with you unless I am in love with you, otherwise what is it all about? I can’t remarry just because I lost my husband. I mean why would I eat fish eggs when I have had caviar. Besides I am too busy with work to even think about the hassles of getting into a relationship. When it comes to my work, nobody can compete with me. I simply dive into my work and give it my best. I am also blessed with everything I want in life; intellectually, emotionally, physically, especially with the kind of work I do. I am supported by so many people who love me such that, the need to remarry is virtually no existent.

But you do have a very special companion
Do I? When you have a relationship like the kind I had with my husband, then you will be done with relationships because I believe lightening cannot strike twice at the same place. There is no day I don’t think about him. He was so in love with me that he felt I was the best thing since slice bread. He thought I was success personified, that I could be the president of Nigeria. That was how much faith he had in me. He felt I was well known and well established in the UK but not in Nigeria. He it was who encouraged me to relocate home because he wanted Nigerians to know about me and my works and he left all, his job and his country and followed me home. His friend thought he had gone mad. And on what basis? On the basis that he believed in me and knew my capabilities. I used to call him my Angel Gabriel. He got me to where I should go, felt I could manage and left. I picked up from where he left and ran with it and I am still running with it. I like to think that I am going the way he felt I should be going. So I don’t know how many men would do that for their wives. He was an extra ordinary man, self effacing. So if I had that and I now have an inkling of what men are doing to their wives presently, I can’t see how many men would live to devote their lives to their wives the way my husband did. It would gladden my heart to see men like my husband because that is how women should be celebrated. Which is why with all of the things going wrong with our country, when I give talks, I say, they don’t blame the men because we women raised and married them. We are responsible for our men yet we don’t ask questions when we see them engage in unusual acts. Which is why I personally hate the title, ‘head of the family’ for men. When you put such titles or burden on a man, you have condemned him to so much burden already. The title is a double edged sword. Because he is head of the family, no one can question the men. Which is why or men die young, carrying too many responsibilities on their shoulders, for his own family and his extended family members. When is he not going to steal?

As Nigerians, we are communal in nature which explains why the need for men to shoulder a lot of responsibilities
That is our downfall, that is at the bottom of corruption clearly, this need to feel that if you are doing well, you must take care of your community. I hold our society indicted for the corruption that is endemic. But believe me, that we are a communal society is a myth, it doesn’t happen anymore, we don’t take responsibility for ourselves because if we did, we would have all of the social infrastructures that we need as a nation with all of the resources at our disposal and at the end of the day, no one will be hanging on to your coat for survival. It is the fiefdom in our culture that makes us not to provide the basic infrastructures in our society. Our politicians are simply suffering from poverty mentality but I have news for them, they will be humiliated in due course, it doesn’t matter how long it will take.

So what next for Taiwo Ajayi Lycett?
Well I am also a life coach and I want to reach more people who would ordinarily not be able to afford my interpersonal fees through TA arts academy where I will be teaching relaxation, speech, acting, presentation, how to focus on clear thinking and so many other things.

Taiwo Ajayi Lycette in a play in the early 70s

Taiwo Ajayi Lycette – The Professsional

Taiwo Ajayi Lycette is a member of several professional bodies

Member and Secretary of the Commonwealth Countries League
Leader of British-African theatre
Fellow of the Society of Nigerian Theatre Artists
Executive Member of the Association of Advertising Agencies of Nigeria
Black Programming Consortium, USA
The British Actors’ Equity
The National Association of Theatre Arts Practitioners (NANTAP)
The Nigerian Institute of Management
The Governing Council, Nigeria-Britain Association.
Member, Advisory Board of the National Council of Women’s Societies
Member, Board of Trustees of the Media & Development Centre
Member, The Millenium Pictures for Development Trust
Member, The African Network for Book Development
Mentor, Member of The Strategies Board of the National Academy for Future Leaders (Nigeria)
Member, Editorial Board of Nigeria’s Media Review
Member, Award Nominating Panels of both The Nigerian Media Merit Award (NMMA) and the Diamond Awards for Media Excellence (DAME).

Taiwo Ajayi Lycette as a journalist…

Associate Editor, Africa Magazine, an Economic, Political and Social journal, based in London (1975)
Publisher, Africa Woman, a political, economic and social magazine for Black and African men and women in the Diaspora.

Taiwo Ajayi Lycette as a teacher…

Proprietress and Rector of TAL House Private School
Talhouse Worldwide Limited for the promotion of Arts and the training and nurturing young artists.
A roving Lecturer for the Commonwealth Institute, London and Teacher Training Colleges in Britain, on African, Art, Music and Dance.

Taiwo Ajayi Lycette as a performer..